[BLOG] Don’t Get It Twisted I’m NOT YOUR MAN.
I’m a silent assassin. I move with the wind. I sit and I watch. I listen and I analyze. And what I’ve realized is that some of your definitions of what a friendship is supposed to be are fucked.
I’ve seen so many comments about how a friend is supposed to be there no matter what and help out a friend no matter the situation and if a friend doesn’t like a person you can’t either. And well…no.
My friendship is exactly that, a friendship. We’re not married,engaged, or dating. I’m not your parent, aunt, or uncle. I am here to give you advice and be here for you in anyway that I can (Just remember I’m not your man). However, that does not mean my life stops for you.
We all have our own issues and we all have our personal lives to attend to, me just like you have shit that I have to worry about. As your friend if I can do anything to help you in any given circumstance I will. But if I can’t that’s just it. I can’t and won’t put myself in a position to where I’m in need for the sake of meeting yours because well…I don’t got it like that (and I’m not your man). What does that mean?
Lets say you need money and my money is already budgeted for my survival (rent, transportation, food,bills and whatever else I may need) I’m not giving you any money, period (Living in New York City is far from cheap). I have to eat, I need a place to live, I have to get to and from work, and I need a functioning cellular device which leaves no room for me to meet your needs. Now if all that gets taken care of and I have some extra funds left, then we can discuss helping your cause.
I can be friends with whomever I choose to be friends with. Life isn’t elementary school, we’re all grown and if I decide to be friends with someone then leave it. It shouldn’t be your concern. You may not like them, and just because you don’t doesn’t mean I don’t. I can think for myself and until they give me a reason to not like them then I will. (For the most part because I generally start off disliking people until they give me a reason to like them but that’s an entirely different post for a different day) But you can’t dictate my friendship choices (because I’m not your man).
Being there no matter what is also a touchy subject. Of course you can call me when you want to vent. Of course you can text me when you feel the need. We’re friends that’s what I’m here for. But also remember, I too have a life and a job. AND I’m NOT YOUR MAN, if I don’t respond to a text within .5seconds of you sending it, relax (because once again I’m NOT YOUR MAN). I don’t want to hear your bitching. I’ll get to it when I can which would probably be when I’m NOT WORKING. You don’t need to be investigating my whereabouts or who I’m with because..well…I’m NOT YOUR MAN. Now if there is a legitimate emergency that requires urgency I’ll leave work in a New York minute.
I don’t expect my friends to give me money, answer every time I call them,tell me who to hang out with, and hangout just because I want to. They have their own lives. We all do. But when we do get together we have a good time. We laugh, we joke, we drink, we eat. If we can help each other out in any circumstance, we can and we do. However, I don’t expect my friends to go broke or homeless trying to help me. Then what kind of friend would that make me? And they don’t expect that from me…or at least I don’t think they do. And if they do, after reading this they shouldn’t.
-Shaun